Making Waffles
by Silent-Phantasm
Summary: It's a one shot I don't really know how to sum it up so, read and see if you likey. Deidara/oc


Authors note: I do not own any of the Naruto cast, or Panic (She is in the belonging of a friend.) I do own Katsura though, so..... to bad, I know..

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This is a story of life, death, and fear. Told through the eyes of a spectator unseen. Then given to a friend to see through the eyes of the beholder:

She stood up and looked around, she knew she was being watched. "Someone has been following me, Katsura." She said to the forest around her.

"I tend to hate you, you know Panic. Don't you?" a smaller girl came out and said to the other.

"Whatever you love me and you know it." Panic said with a grin that could scare the hair off a cat.

"That's funny cause I don't remember that. So, how's life lately.." Katsura asked

"It's been good. You should come back with me, you'd like it."

"No, thats not me, yet."

"And that would mean?"

"Maybe I'll come , but not now. I still have things to accomplish in my life without being ordered around by the man." Katsura smirked as she said this waving her fist back and forth at the wrist.

"I'll see you there, eventually. Bye, Katsura." Panic said giving a unnecessarily large wave.

"Farewell, we will meet again, I hope." Katsura waved in the same way then turned to walk away.

Panic stuck her tongue out at Katsura, who turned around to return the jester before actually forsaking the area. After a few moments of silence The colorless one started to walk into another direction. 'I have to make sure she keeps that promise.' She thought to herself as she walked in a lonesome manor, her cloak flowing behind her in a cape like fashion. After a time of walking Panic walked into a cave, deeper and deeper she continued on until she reached a formation in the rock, here she focused her chakra to open the door to the Akatsuki base.

After the first door through the cave wall there was a long hall that lead to another door, she opened it and walked into a bright room. The living room. Two heads turned to see her. "Panic, your back, how was it?

"It was as usual, although I did get to see an old friend for a moment. I plan on dragging her here one day if I have to." She said with her smirk. "How were things while I was away, Kisame?"

"How do you think?" Kisame said rolling his eyes.

She laughed at him. "Sucks to be you then, huh." Panic continued to laugh and sat down on the couch. "What about you Deidara, Have you been ok?"

"I've been pretty good. Sasori has been gone and I haven't had to hear him drag on about anything." He said smiling back at Panic.

"That's great." Her heart would have skipped a beat had it been pulsating as it should. "Do you like red?"

"Um...... it's an ok color, if thats what you mean." Deidara gave Panic a somewhat confused look.

"I like red, it's one of my favorite colors." As she spoke, she thought to herself. 'What in the hell am I talking about? Do you like red? What the Fuck kinda question is that?'

"I'm gonna go and get something to eat. talk to you in awhile." He said interrupting her train of thought and getting up to go the kitchen.

"ok." Panic then grabbed the remote and turned on the TV then started channel flipping. She found some random show about stupid people who couldn't tell they were obviously in love (*CoughOuranHighCoughCough*) and started watching.

After about a half hour Panic got up and walked to her room. She arrived in a minute or so and opened the door, she went to the closet. Panic searched through her apparel to find a more comfortable outfit. She ended up with some tattered jeans, a black tank top, and an assortment of belts and bracelets. She lied on her bed looking at the ceiling and pondering some thoughts. 'What should I make for dinner? What would Deidara want? Why do I care what he wants, I'm making pizza..' She then fell asleep thinking.

Panic awoke to find Deidara staring at her from the end of the bed. "What are you doing on my bed?" She questioned.

Without a word he answered her. He crawled towards her and put his lips to hers, they felt warm and welcoming. Panic's eyes widened as she tried to find at least a word to object. She found none. Kissing him back she ran her fingers through his long blond hair pulling out his ponytail genitally. He retaliated by wrapping his arms around her waist and pulling her on top of him then even closer.

"Panic. Panic, Wake up!" A voice called her from her slumber.

"I'm up! Now what do you want?" She half shouted back.

"I want dinner. Now go make food before Hidan buys takeout again!"

"Why don't you make food then, Kakuzu, If your so worried about our cash go and do it yourself." Both his voice and words betrayed his name to her.

"Because no one would eat my cooking. Also Pein wants his dinner, so I suggest you go and make something." He said in a matter fact kinda way.

"Whatever, I'll be down in a bit. Now go away!"

After a few moments of recomposing herself. She went downstairs and to the kitchen, where she started on making pizzas. As Panic was working on the second pizza of three, a voice came from behind her. "Do you want some help?"

Panic turned and saw a certain face that reminded her of a not so awful dream she'd had. "Sure, if you really want to." She replied her face lighting up just as she turned away. A lucky break. "You can start the last pizza, it's going to be pepperoni." She pointed to a circle of dough that had already been spread. "You know what to do, right?" She still refused to look at him, just in case.

"I think I got it. Sauce, cheese, then pepperoni, right?" He asked to make sure, he didn't want to fuck it up completely.

"That's right." She said then got strait back to work.

After Panic finished she started to clean up her area when she got a face full of pizza sauce. She heard a laugh from the other side of the room. She wiped her eyes, picked up a hand full of cheese, mixed it in the sauce, hid it behind her back, and started walking across the room slowly toward her assailant. When she reached Deidara he looked up and smiled, Panic Blushed, then smirked back shoving the cheese ball in his face.

"That's how you want to play. Then let the war begin." He jumped behind the counter picking up some unused dough and slinging it as Panic.

She dodged. Then turned around and grabbed the sinks sprayer. She used it, Deidara was sopping wet by the time he got up to her and stole it to return the favor.

Kisame walked in and looked around in horror. "My Kitchen! What did you two do?" He shouted.

Panic grabbed to sprayer back and got Kisame. "That's what we're doing." Deidara and panic laughed in unison.

Kisame looked at the pair in shock. "Oh, you just wait until Leader hears about this!"

"Oh no, however shall we escape his wrath?" Deidara said with a snicker.

" We could run and hide, I have a friend who is doing the same and would take us in." Panic laid the sarcasm on thick. "Then again, we may have more luck with leader." With that both she and Deidara went into a laughing fit.

"Whatever, I hate you both. Itachi! Panic and Deidara are being mean to me!" He shouted across the house as he stormed out of the kitchen.

"Wow, we should make diner together more often." Deidara said through tears.

"I know, we could invite Kisame back too. I think he might bring Itachi. Oh the fun that would be." Panic imagined the scenario in her mind with Itachi and his clans jutsu. "The food might come out a bit burnt though." They laughed a bit more when Leaded walked in.

"What the hell happened in here?" He said staring them down in a way only he could.

"We made pizza." Panic stated the obvious pointing to the oven.

"OK, and what else happened?" He questioned, now slightly irritated.

"We may or may not of had the littlest of water wars, and Kisame may or may not walked in the middle of it." Deidara said in a nonchalant manor.

"Kisame, you are like half fish, or shark or something. What is wrong with a little water?" Leader said squeezing the bride of his nose.

"Nothing, but look at what was once my beautiful, clean kitchen. It's ruined, a complete disaster area!" He said with flames in his eyes and fist in air.

"I don't see a problem as long as they clean up after themselves.... And I get my food." Pein added the last part quickly as a threat to the pizza makers.

"We got this." Deidara said as he waved them away. "Panic and I will so pwn this room back into cleanliness!" He shouted in a strange determination.

"...ok then... Whatever floats your little ass boat." Leader hurried out of the room to go watch the rest of his soap opera he was missing.

"Just make sure you get all the pizza sauce off the ceiling, please." Kisame sighed as he walked out to the living room.

Deidara picked up a rag and stared at the counters near the sink. Panic picked up the sprayer to get the ceiling Kisame was so worried about. After all the red was removed from the upper walls she grabbed a sponge and helped wipe up. After all was wiped down they soaked up the water with towels. They hardly beat the alarm on the oven, but they did.

Panic pulled the pizzas out and called everyone to the dining room to eat. Almost all the Akatsuki were there, the only missing party member was Zetsu.....which is probably a good thing in the long run.

They ate in silence due to Leaders foul mood (he missed a huge revelation in his soap opera and can't understand the story.). The only one who know the actual reason was Konan, who was the one who refused to tell him what had happened, so she could hold it over his head and get something later.

After that, most everyone scattered to their rooms to relax or just go strait to bed early. Tobi, Panic, and Deidara went to the living room and Itachi was grumbling in the kitchen because it was his night to do dishes.

"What do you guys want to watch? Tobi doesn't mind, nothing he wants to watch is on right now." Tobi said with what everyone assumed was a smiling face.

"Well, lets see what's on." Panic grabbed the remote and started flipping through channels and channels of nothing. When as she almost had gone in a complete circle of boring she found a wonderful show no one could resist. Scarred. "How about this?"

"What is it about?" Deidara asked, having never seen or herd of it.

"It's just what it says. It's a bunch of jackasses who do dumb shit and get hurt and are left with scars." She said back with a smirk. "So I'm gonna watch with or without you."

"Tobi thinks that he'll go help Itachi with the dishes...." He got up and wandered to the kitchen.

"Sounds interesting..." Deidara said staring the the TV. "Let's watch it."

Panic had already turned the channel and just as it started too. Jacoby was going on and on about the massive amount of Fucked-upness the next clip had. When they finally showed the video it was of a kid who attempted to grind down a pole in roller blades. He failed epically and busted his leg in half.

"Ow, that would suck major ass, wouldn't it?" Panic looked at Deidara who was looking back at her.

"What, I missed it. Will they show it again?" He said like he was trying to cover something up.

"Yes, now make sure to watch th TV this time."

"Fine." The clip replayed a few seconds later and Deidara grimaced as he fell and all you could hear was a wicked snap. "Could you imagine how bad that would suck and how much people would make fun of you for being such a complete idiot?"

"Yes, I have the type of friends that will never let you forget anything no matter how stupid.... they are such bitches, but I love them." Panic said with a shrug.

"That must bite ass." Deidara said turning back to Panic. "I'm glad no one who works here does that to often. I mean come on, They wouldn't make it here long before someone killed them."

"I'm trying to get them to join, but it's taking forever, I tend to miss them sometime." Panic sighed, they were no longer paying any attention to the television.

"Why don't you just knock them out and drag them here, I'll help. Lets go! Pein!" He ran off to Leaders room in a hurry.

Panic sat there on the couch starring into the direction he left with a What-the-hell-did-I-just-get-into look.

Deidara ran into the hall. He stopped at the last door to the right then knocked. A pissed and half asleep looking Pein answered the door. "What in the fucking hell do you want?!?"

"I wanted to know if Panic and I could go find a few new members for the Akatsuki?" He looked at Pein who rolled his eyes.

"I don't give a damn. You have twenty-four hours, and only bring one back please, I don't want to hear Kakuzu bitch about to many mouths to feed." He waved Deidara away and shut the door to return to bed.

Deidara ran back down the hall to where Panic should have been. She was not there. He went to the kitchen, the only one there was Tobi, who was doing Itachi's dishes. He thought for a moment about where she could have gone in that amount of time. He rushed back to the hall to Panic's room. When he reached the door he immediately twisted the handle and walked in before thinking.

Panic stood outside her closet, laking a shirt or bra. She herd the door and spun around covering herself. She saw Deidara standing there like a deer in the headlight of a car. After the second it took to regain himself he turned around and slammed the door closed behind him. She stood there for another moment starring at the door. After that she found her new bra, shirt, and cloak. She put them on and went back to the living room to see Deidara. When she arrived there she saw him red as the eyes of an Uchiha.

"Sorry..... I really did forget to knock though, I was just really excited that you'd see your friend and all." He said with absolutely no eye contact.

"It's ok. It's actually not a first. I'm getting used to it now. At least this time I was wearing pants." She said rubbing the back of her head.

Deidara blushed deeper as his thoughts wondered to what it just might look like under those bottoms. "D..D ...Do you want to go now to find a friend of yours. Or we could wait till morning. Pein said only one so, it shouldn't take to long."

"Let's take off now. We have a better chance in Finding her this way. I know just where to start. Come on lets go." Panic said opening the door to leave.

They left the base the same way Panic had entered earlier that day. Awhile later they arrived at the clearing Panic had had that run in with Katsura. "She when this way if my memory serves." So they started off in the direction of south-west.

After a few hours Deidara and Panic ran into a small village. They walked up to a small group of people and started asking questions. The whole group had seen Katsura not long ago. She had gone to an inn. They immediately split up and started asking the inn keepers about a little red head that may be staying in their inn. Deidara found the inn on his fourth try.

"Panic, I found where she is staying it's that one over there." Deidara pointed to the building he had just exited.

"Lets go. I'm gonna say before hand that I have no clue how she's gonna react to being taken against her will."

"That will just make it all the more fun." He said smiling back to Panic as they walked into the rather small, but cozy inn.

The arrived at the door to room eighteen. Panic knocked on the door and waited. After a moment or two they heard the door unlock. It opened slowly. "Panic... That's quite the surprise, Twice in one day. Come on in." Katsura waved the two into her room.

The couple of Akatsuki members walked into the room quickly. "So Katsura, Where are you heading?" Panic asked trying to act as though she wasn't about to attempt a kidnapping.

"I'm not to sure, just kinda moving here and there so I don't get caught." Katsura looked at Panic with one of her what-are-you-about-to-start look.

"Oh." She looked to the ceiling that was only about a foot and a half from her head.

"Is that your boyfriend? Oh, Panic found herself a terrorist." She said with a bit of a chuckle.

"Actually yes, he is." She said giving him a say-anything-and-you-die look, she was quite famous for that one now.

"Oh well, to bad cause now I can't torture you about it. What a pain. Anyway, What do you want, and cut the crap. I know you don't just come for lovely little visits. Especially at this time. It is my bed time." Katsura said looking at the clock behind her.

As she looked away Panic signaled for Deidara to start the plan they had concocted on the walk there. He turned to Katsura and started his part. "I have a question."

"And that would be." She shifted in her chair, somethings wasn't right. Katsura ignored the gut feeling and turned to Deidara.

"How did you know I am a terrorist? Panic didn't even mention my name and you knew off-hand.?" This was a genuine question, he had wondered since she made the comment.

"I have information sources that keep me updated on anything that may be a threat to me, or I just feel like knowing. I have an extensive profile on the Akatsuki." Katsura answered his question, and waited for anymore that may follow.

Panic started her half of the plan as Katsura answered. Panic released a powerful sleep inducing jutsu. Her hand glowed a bright purple. She walked behind Katsura, who turned around to see a eerie looking Panic just in time before a hand was used to cover her mouth. She drifted off to sleep without much of a fight as she inhaled the purple aura. After she pasted out Panic picked Katsura up and started to leave. Deidara Turned to her. "Why did you tell her we were dating?" He turned colors again.

"I know if I said we weren't she'd have torqued my ass for sure. It's a little game called fifty-six questions. Did you mind that much?" Panic looked away to try to hide that her face was almost a matching shade.

"N...No I didn't mind a bit, It just took me off guard is all...... kinda got my hopes up." Deidara mumbled the last part.

"What? What was that last bit?" Panic asked raising an eyebrow with Katsura now situated half dead on her back as if she was getting a piggyback ride.

"You just kinda got my hopes up....." He whispered it again as he looked away at the corner of the room.

"Damn you." She pointed strait at him. "Mumbler!!!" She screamed at the top of her lungs waking everyone in a five mile radius.

"I said that you got my hopes up!!!!" He yelled back almost as loud, than turned around so she couldn't see his face.

That one took Panic for a loop. It was her turn to be a deer in the headlights. "Are you serious?" Her face, what would look like it was permanently dyed red.

"Yeah....I know it's stupid and all, but, you know...." He still hadn't looked her in the eyes. Due to his running across the floor. "Do you think you might go out with me for real, so you know you don't have to pretend and she never has to know you lied to her." He glanced up at Panic who was also looking away.

"Um.... Sure, that would be cool." She looked back at him to find him starring back with a huge grin. "What makes you so damn happy?"

"I got a fucking smoking hot girlfriend!" His smile broadened.

If that wasn't enough to break the awkward floating in the room, what Katsura said in her sleep did. "Neji.... Sasuke.....in my closet.... strange noises...." The now official couple started to laugh their asses off.

"Wow, Panic. I'm sorry but that shit is just strange." Deidara said almost suffocating due to lack of air.

They walked back to the base holding hands in the light of what they thought was the biggest full moon either had ever seen. "Isn't it so cool. Katsura is gonna be pissed I knocked her out, she probably wanted to see it." Panic said not feeling the slightest bit guilty.

"She will forgive you... I think." H said kissing Panic on the cheek, lightly but not to softly.

Panic's face flushed as they continued to the base. When they arrived home Panic Lied Katsura on the couch, then headed up stairs and to bed.

Panic awoke the next morning to quite the commotion downstairs, it was something like this...

"You!!!!" A mans voice came from the living room, it was most defiantly Hidan.

"You!!!!" Katsura's voice came up a few moments later from the same room.

Panic hurried down to the living room. She found Hidan and Katsura staring each other down. "How do you two know each other?" Panic questioned.

"This bitch dissed Jashin, then she had he balls to run away when I was gonna sacrifice her!"

"Like hell I was just gonna sit there and die for some phony ass God!"

Panic gave them the really-now look. Then proceeded to find a way to stop them from killing each other. "Hidan you can't sacrifice her..... first off she's a close friend of mine. Second she is our new member. Third she is my sacrifice to the rain God!"

By this time the whole Akatsuki had accumulated in the room to watch the show. "What? This whore is mine, She has to die!"

"I am no ones whore!" Katsura threw the remote at Hidan's head, hitting his forehead.

"Whatever, I don't care anymore you two work it out!" Panic gave up and let the two try and kill each other. That ended with Hidan missing his head until he agreed to leave Katsura alone. "I'm making breakfast."

Panic went into the kitchen once again. This time to make waffles. She mixed the batter until it was only a little lumpy, and plugged in the waffle maker. As she did so Deidara was sneaking in behind her. He glomped her down to her floor. He lied on top of her. "Good morning, how are you this fine evening?"

"I was great, but now I'm better." Panic looked at him seductively.

"Oh really, Any way I could just make your day?" He leaned in closer.

"Lets found out shall we?" She raised an eyebrow at him and pulled him into a kiss.

Deidara Held his lips to hers as their lips moved in sync. His hands traveling up her shirt in a slow sensual manor. Panic placed a hand on the back of his neck deepening their kiss as he licked her lips for entrance. Panic granted. Her other hand found his hair as she copied a certain more she recalled from a dream she had had, not so long ago. Just as his hands made their way to the bra buckle they heard a voice.

"Why me, it's always me, and Always in my kitchen! What the hell guys, that's just not cool!" The pair shot up to see Kisame in the doorway looking at them in horror. "What do you call this one?"

"Panic smiled ear to ear and said happily. "Making waffles."

:Thus as I said it was of life, in the people. Death, in the Panic. Then there was fear in the love. So I must leave you with that and hope you see the beauty through another's eyes.

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I know Deidara didn't have his stutter or whatever you want to call it. If anyone thinks it has that big of an impact on the story inform me and I'll do something about it.... although you probably won't like what I'll do..... but it really would be funny as hell.

Also I know this story was crap... But "Panic" has to like it anyway cause I made it. (pity her.)


End file.
